Moonstar Minus Politics

Clowning Around

2012-01-19T15:55:00.000-08:00

I'm going to take Ro out in this outfit from now on. It's actually a nice warm outfit. And it's better than some of the other vintage outfits I have packed for our vacation. You will see, soon enough.

This week: Lets see... using my new Excalibur 3500 dehydrator to make a second batch of beef jerky, three different flavors. A sweet BBQ wet marinade, a smoky BBQ dry rub and a curry flavored marinade.

I'm going to drink some fresh green juice all day tomorrow and Saturday along with some Chia porridge (FIBER! SUPER FIBER CHIA! BEWARE!) and hopefully not only will my little sinus/ear thing be gone but I hope to feel really good and detoxed in preparation for my trip.

Packing to take the three kids to Florida for some sun bathing and Vitamin D soaking up. The beef jerky will come in handy for the plane trip. I also bought $47 in other snacks. Overkill?

HOW TO KEEP A BABY STILL ON A PLANE??????

Stickers..... Food.... Boobs... Apple.... Chocolate? That's all I got.

Porridge for Baby

2012-01-18T08:33:00.000-08:00

Enjoying a homemade porridge of oats, chia and flax, pulsed in the food processor and cooked on the stovetop with water, local cream, cinnamon and organic raisins.

Little bugger has been picky lately. He likes meat, cheese and apples anytime but most other things get thrown on the floor or pushed away. I'm glad he liked this the last two days. Even eggs have fallen out of his favor recently.

Apparently breastmilk tastes better than everything, except meat.

Yesterday he was very excited about being handed half a pork steak, after pointing and whining about said pork steak, which he held and munched on for quite some time. He's starting to smell like beef stew. That beefy smell I remember DD having, she liked meat too.

Seems his job lately is to throw everything on the floor. Everything. And preferably on the floor in a different room so it must be picked up AND moved to it's proper room. The floor of my office looks like a war zone with all the markers, pencils and papers that the big kids leave out, now, all over the floor, markers without caps, half eaten crayons, crumpled up chewed on papers. He opens drawers now, sticking his hand as far in as he can to grab whatever he can, so he can inspect it and throw it on the floor.

Sleeping times aren't going much better. Bugger wakes me up no later than 7:30 AM. That's before 9 AM, which is my usual wake up time. This doesn't sit well with me. By 9 AM he is cranky and insisting on taking a morning nap! This is not acceptable.

My third complaint is his new Houdini tricks. No high chair in the world could keep him buckled in. At least not the 1950's chair we have that uses an old belt. I need a five point harness.

I think he's going to start turning door knobs next. I can tell he's trying. There will be no stopping him after that.

Reuseable Toilet Paper?

2012-01-16T07:25:00.000-08:00

Of course this only addresses the financial savings of not having to buy toilet paper. The amount of money probably seems trivial to most Americans. We must also think about waste, cutting down and processing trees, shipping to warehouses, shipping to stores. But most importantly, for me, having a thick piece of damp cloth to clean myself with is far superior to a piece of dry tissue you can see through. It simply does a much better job. Now, in public, after using disposable toilet paper I can't wait to get home and clean up proper. No yucky bits left behind either.

Got old receiving blankets, flannel shirts or T shirts? Cut them up and use them. No need to hem them if you don't sew.

Raw Food: Berries and Cream

2012-01-12T12:57:00.000-08:00

This is a really satisfying raw snack or light meal. The cream tastes so much like real reddi whip. Use fresh mixed berries, pineapple, bananas or other fruit. For the cream: in a bowl add 1/2 cup raw cashews and enough water to cover. Let this soak at least 15 mins to 1 hour to soften the nuts and get the enzymes working. Add the drained cashews and 1-2 dates to the blender and slowly add enough water to blend into a nice thick whipped cream consistency. I also added a touch of vanilla and cinnamon.

I'm so excited I received my Excalibur 3500 dehydrator and my Ninja Kitchen System, super blender/food processor/juicer/smoothie maker yesterday! I made a delish raw soup with dehydrated mushrooms and Braggs Liquid Aminos (using the Bragg's recommendation from Allysa Cohen's book) and also dehydrated some onions, red pepper and jicama enough to soften and warm them into a raw "stirfry". It was a very satisfying meal and so nice to have things warm but not cooked. The Excalibur book goes into detail about testing they have done showing enzymatic activity remains stable at least up to the usual 118 F cut off to be considered a raw food and usually it remains intact up to 140 F or even beyond.

The Story of Blue Erysa

2012-01-10T08:02:00.000-08:00

So I'm convinced my four year old is a artistic genius. She's been drawing and painting since she was 10 months old.

"Blue Erysa was a baby in her mum's tummy. Then her mum ate a mushroom and the mushroom got stuck in the umbilical cord and Blue Erysa died". But don't worry because the mom, with very long arms, had another baby, Green Erysa.

Week Two: The Report

2012-01-09T12:17:00.000-08:00

So I fell off the wagon yesterday a little bit. Tomorrow is always another day though, to get back on the wagon.

This morning we made gluten free cinnamon biscuits. They turned out a lot like cinnamon scones. Sort of dry but a decent small snack. I like that Bob's Red Mill gluten free all purpose flour is based on bean flour. It has three times more fiber and calcium than white wheat flour and some healthy fat. I boosted it with some gluten free oat bran to add fiber.

Yesterday I made Sue Gregg's soaked 100% whole grain pancakes using some gluten free oat groats, home ground and soaked in kefir overnight. I love that recipe! I ate some and actually felt good afterwards!

Last week we started using a Sili Squeeze. It's like one of those Happy Tot or applesauce pouches you can buy at the store only reusable! It's basically a squeezeable sippy cup and it is sort of hard to use. They are coming out with a valve that is free flowing soon which I would be interested in trying. I've been experimenting with different GAPS approved meat stock/bone broths and milk kefir smoothies in it for baby Ro. He certainly enjoys some of the creations but isn't terribly thrilled about the broths. Today he had milk kefir, a bit of banana, strawberry, flax and chia seeds.

I keep thinking maybe this kid will put some weight on if I can just get some more food or fats into him. He's a spindly little fella. So much different from my other linebacker children.

I've been trying to get down the kefirs, kombucha and fermented veggies. I've got some amazing homemade fermented kimchi in the fridge that was like heaven. More probiotic stuff would help my sugar cravings. Coffee was out for a whole two days but I guess I'm not ready to give it up just yet. Been saying that for 20 years.

I've got a new blog look. New year, new look. I loved this sunset/wildlife pic I took the other day while hiking. And this profile pic from a few months ago. Love my big fat dreadlocks! They're getting long. I can't wait till their down to my butt! Earth Mama MoonStar all the way!

Being Gluten Free and Vegan!

2012-01-03T11:24:00.000-08:00

Or

NOT Another New Year's Resolution Blog About Going on a Diet!

I have been vegan all year! Not something I planned to be a new years resolution but something that's been on my mind for months and in the planning since Thanksgiving. It takes me a while to ramp up to giving up all my sweets and breads and all that makes my brain say "yes" and my blood sugar say "no"!

So I'm in a testing phase. I've cut myself down to a few foods. I will test my blood sugar before and after to make sure I can handle that food before adding something else back in. So far, regular long grain brown rice was a no no. That's depressing.

I had originally planned on doing a full year of raw vegan (was NOT planning on starting around the first of the year but that's how it worked out). But I don't think DH is fond of long commitments like that. I will sacrifice and call it 3-6 months at least 90% raw or until I get my health under control since apparently just having a healthy diet isn't enough to reverse my diabetes, and won't EVER be enough but I do hope to drink a cafe mocha again, some day. And this time, I won't get pregnant and set myself back.

You can read about my previous experiments in treating my PCOS related pre diabetes HERE.

C has been gluten free all year. This is for his ADHD which we have been seeing someone for regularly for about 4 months. I actually started this whole thing knowing that C had a wheat problem but I needed someone with authority to tell him that. He has been on omega 3 essential fatty acid supplements (very common for ADHD) and I feel that has helped a lot. He also has a weight issue and I hope cutting gluten out helps with his mood and his weight. I know gluten is responsible for a lot of my mood, weight and fertility problems. I had his doctor chat him up about how important it is to give the gluten free thing a try and I think that helped. We are making some products with gluten free flour and buying some gluten free pasta and he seems fine with it. Gluten free cereal and tortillas have also been used daily though I am not a fan of using commercial gluten free products on a regular basis since rice corn or tapioca flour isn't nutritious. I need to do more cooking with coconut and almond flour instead.

Trying to find what works for me and what works for him at the same time. I might just find that we both need the same thing! Meanwhile the O blood types in the family just keep getting thinner and thinner!

For more info on diabetes and gluten read the Heart Scan Blog.

Our DCFS Case is Closed!

2011-12-19T18:07:00.000-08:00

Nearly two months after our incident at the emergency room where we were turned into DCFS by an angry nurse, DCFS finally stopped by and closed our case.

According to the caseworker I was turned in because I did not immediately give R a dose of oral steroids which they thought he needed for a diaper rash. The rash was not related to the reason for the ER visit.

A nurse dropped an oral syringe of steriods off asking that I administer them myself when he was done nursing. He nursed and fell asleep. During that time I decided oral steroids was a bit of overkill for a slight diaper rash and asked to speak with the doctor about getting a topical cream instead. I did eventually talk to the doctor and he had no problem with that. He suggested we use over the counter hydrocortisone.

I don't understand how asking to speak to the doctor results in turning me in for medical neglect. If this is the true reason then any parent could be turned in simply for asking questions regarding their child's care.

I think it's pretty obvious that the reason given to DCFS was fabricated in order to get back at me personally.

What makes this case so dissapointing is that the hospital refused to give up the nurses' last names or license numbers so I cannot file a complaint with the state. The hospital also refuses to respond to my formal complaint. As far as I know they have taken no action at all.

Birfday Boy

2011-12-18T12:13:00.000-08:00

Little man has been earthside for a whole year. Seems impossible. Seems I was just in the hospital hugging him on his first day thinking "he's going to be one before I know it". Sure enough.

He's napping on my lap. Because babies are entitled to that. Barely any more hair than he had the day he was born. Just a blond wisp, enough not to be totally bald. Flat nose, curled mouth, sweet smell. He hasn't changed much 'cept for the 13.5 pounds and 8 inches gained.

My smallest one year old, by far.

Oh and the addition of personality. A real funny man. Sweet too.

Ro has added so much to our lives. Ever since he was a little floating embryo. Ro's smile makes everything better.

Glühwein and Futjen

2011-12-16T12:13:00.000-08:00

This year week we are exploring German traditional Christmas food fare by trying Gluhwein and Futjen. Gluhwein is hot spiced red wine. Futjen (ferden or fudden) is a family recipe and tradition coming from Germany. It is a cardamom spiced doughut ball made fresh with yeast, fried and rolled in sugar. It is traditionally served on Christmas eve with oyster stew which is also our family tradition.

We will be celebrating R's first birthday tonight with both after dinner treats.

Gluhwein

1 bottle red wine
1 cinnamon stick
grated nutmeg
50g brown sugar
1 orange, sliced
1 dried bay leaf
few cloves

Put the wine in a saucepan with the sugar, orange slices, bayleaf and the spices.

Heat the wine gently until the sugar is dissolved. Taste and add more sugar if necessary.

Strain the Gluewhein into mugs or heatproof glasses and serve.

From http://www.tasty-german-recipe.com/mulled-wine-recipes.html

Futjens

1 qt. milk,

1/2 cup sugar,

5 or 6 eggs,

1/2 teaspoon cardamom seeds crushed,

1/2 teaspoon salt,

1 cup of raisins (0ptional, we don't use them),

1 packet dry yeast.

Scald milk, let cool.
Add beaten eggs, sugar, cardamom and salt. Then add raisins.

Add yeast that soaked in 1/4 cup water and 1/2 teaspoon of sugar that has raised
to top of a cup.

Add enough flour that will make a dough that will drop off
a spoon. Let raise to top of bowl.

Drop by spoonful in hot oil, turning when browned.

Roll in sugar or a cinnamon sugar mixture.

I Hate Being a SAHM

2011-12-13T16:35:00.000-08:00

I think it's about one out of every ten days that I Hate Being a SAHM.

I love the idea of being with my kids. Homeschooling, yes that is something I want for my kids. Providing a nurturing loving stable environment. But in practice it just doesn't work for me. I'll tell you why.

SAHMing gets no respect. In fact it gets the opposite of respect.

I have those days where I wake up to a trashed house and spend all day just trying to catch up. The baby needs me for feeds and diaper changes and being put down for naps. There's homeschooling to do, meals to cook and clean up after, old dogs that pee on the floor every hour. Three kids who take 4 hours cleaning up a mess that took them 20 minutes to make. A son, who I must admit to myself is special needs, who fights me on EVERYTHING ALL DAY LONG EVERY SINGLE DAY. He has excuses, pretends he can't hear me. Claims he does not understand the request. Tries to reason his way out of even the most simple duty.

We have had a list of chores on the wall for three months and he STILL will not complete the chores! It's a freaking star chart, like for kindergartners. He will actually still claim that he "didn't know" he was supposed to get dressed in the morning. This is the kind of supremely frustrating thing I am talking about that happens in my life every single day all day long.

So I feverishly try to get it all done and then some. So the kids can have homemade meals and cookies and birthday parties and special Christmases on top of it all. And when I sit down, at the computer, to nurse, instead of staring at the blank wall or TV what do I hear??? "ALL mom does is play on the computer"!

Then my nine year old comes in and tells me I'm lucky that daddy gives me money and a place to live so I can play on the computer all day. Yes, according to my family I am nothing but a freeloader. And that breaks my heart. Because maybe they really don't care.

Maybe they would rather be in daycare eating goldfish crackers. Maybe they would see me on the weekends, if I could get the day off work.

Goodbye Boris

2011-12-08T15:52:00.001-08:00

Boris left us Monday night just before midnight.

About ten years ago we decided to get a cat companion for our current cat. We visted the Humane Society. When we walked into the room for older cats we saw the biggest fattest grey tabby tom cat and knew right away he was the one we wanted. He was sweet and we took him home.

Boris loved to walk along the back of the couch and head butt you with his big furry head. Especially when it was meal time. He was always sweet and loved when people came over. He was always sweet with the three kids. Even when they were rough.

A couple years ago Boris lost weight and nothing I did ever got him to put any weight back on.

Monday morning when he wasn't in his bed I found him curled up breathing softly and I knew he didn't have long left. We stayed with him all day. C cried a lot and we spent time working through his first encounter with grief since becoming an age where he his fully aware of death.

After the kids went to bed we spent a few hours with him and finally he died with my hand on his heart.

The kids buried him today. His little face looked very sweet. Just like we will always remember him.

Christmas Boris

Colorado Landscapes

2011-11-29T17:23:00.000-08:00

Some landscape photos from our trip.

Glenwood Springs Colorado

2011-11-27T10:22:00.000-08:00

Finally, we made it to Colorado. We have been wanting to make a trip for two years. It kept getting put off. I am so glad to prepare for the long winter this way. A nice vacation in the mountains with the family to celebrate Thanksgiving! Even though we had chinese take out and I drank too much wine and got oh so ill.

Our hotel overlooks a beautiful green ridge and snow white capped mountain top. The mountains are so pretty now, ranging from green, tan, red and white all layered and cut with blue watered rocky rivers. How amazing.

Yesterday we drove 30 minutes over to Glenwood Springs. The Rockies are truly majestic. My kids are fortunate to experience such beauty, and I am glad they appreciate it like I do. We all thought it was like driving through the Grand Canyon. The road follows the Colorado River.

We explored the town, enjoyed a cafe for warm drinks, had an awesome sushi lunch then rode the gondola up the mountain.

At the top is Glenwood Caverns. We all rode the Alpine Coaster multiple times. Took a tour of the Fairy Caves.

Riding the gondola down the mountain at sunset was a lucky surprise.

We spent the chilly evening soaking in the natural minerals at Glenwood Hot Spring Pool. This pool is huge and at night it's dimly lit with heavy steam rising. Quite an ethereal experience but easy to loose one or two kids. Baby R seemed strangely quiet and calm in the pool. No doubt a welcome warm after braving the cold wind on the mountain top all afternoon.

Swimming outside in 30 degree temperatures! Only a hot chocolate could have made it better.

After warming our bones we all went out for burgers.

I'm breathing a sigh of contentment. Now I'm looking forward to going home, decorating for Christmas and enjoying cozy nights in front of the fireplace with my wonderful family.

Homeschool Journal November 2011 vol 1

2011-11-14T08:26:00.000-08:00

Fall is upon us and school is in full swing. Ok well sort of.

C is in "4th grade" now, as much as a homeschooler can be in just one grade level. It's more like 4th for english, art, music, 5th for math, 6th for science and reading.

Concentration is a big issue. He is being treated naturally for ADHD. Before I started taking him to our naturopath the symptoms were taking over our lives. Now, it's more of a minor issue. As long as he takes his EFAs he seems to be much more able to complete his work. Though, the next step is eliminating wheat from his diet so he can really concentrate. So far, FAIL. That's my fault. Wheat is a hard one to get rid of!

Today we studied English and the use of WELL/GOOD, YOUR/YOU'RE and ITS/IT'S. He completed his work upstairs in his room (turns out this is a great place for him to concentrate) in record time and received two 100% and two 75%. Not bad considering it's his least favorite subject.

Preschool... well I'm still gathering new ideas. We have been doing our seasonal crafts and experimenting with water beads. Lots of pencil drawing. I put up posters about "getting along". We are working on using nice words, treating people with respect and working out our differences. I got a game to teach proper nutrition and food groups so we check each meal to see if we have a good balance of protein, carbs, fruit/veggies. So far preschool has not been very structured but what about it needs to be right?

"Daddy"

2011-11-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

"Daddy" by little N age 4

Daddy comes with a beard, eyebrows and ear gauges. Only one problem. His mustache is on top of his nose.

Follow Up

2011-10-27T06:26:00.000-07:00

I want to thank you all for the tremendous outpouring of support. It has been four days since our incident at the emergency room. R was unusually fussy overall and cried inconsolably when I laid him down for each diaper change the first two days. It was clear that he was in pain despite giving him pain relievers. His fever disappeared with antibiotics. I hope this is all forgotten by him now mentally and physically. R is the sweetest child I have ever known. It is very sad that this happened to such an incredibly sweet boy. I will continue to be especially nurturing to him as he heals from this experience. As well as with my other two older children who also have the lasting memory.

When they were discussing it amongst themselves the next day my 4 year old daughter yells "They tried to rip his peepee skin"! Demonstrating to me that she was paying attention to all of the hoopla and I regret that she had to be there to witness such a thing. My older son feels very compelled to write a complaint to the hospital asking for the nurses to be fired. He stated they should be fired because they were yelling at me and arguing. I will not intervene other than to lend an ear to listen or to answer questions. I want them to feel however they feel whether it be nothing or something.

I am proud to say that my children saw their mother stand up for herself and her child, in an educated and reasonably calm manner, considering the fact that she was being yelled at. Children need to see women with strength. Children also need to know that their parent will stand up for them.

I have felt traumatized and am still dealing with anxiety, insomnia and loss of appetite. I have lost over 5 pounds already. The act of being required to push someone off of my son in order to protect him has effected me and I cannot get the image out of my head. There is also the anxiety of waiting for DCFS to follow up with my case which requires a home inspection and they give themselves up to 60 days to do that. Something I have absolutely no fear of since my children have a wonderful enriching home but nonetheless this whole experience has left me feeling criminalized for completely unjust reasons.

Tax dollars hard at work....avenging two nurses.

The Greatest Danger to an Intact Boy

2011-10-25T08:26:00.000-07:00

Recently my intact infant son and I experienced intact ignorance of shocking levels. We are subsequently being investigated by DCFS for "improper hygiene".

Friday night and Saturday morning R (10 months) spiked a high fever and was acting lethargic. I took him to the closest emergency room, leaving the rest of the family at home which I thought would make the trip more simple. Boy was I wrong. While there they noticed he had some diaper rash consisting of some redness and scabbing. I had posted Thursday on a local cloth diapering facebook page about R apparently having an allergic reaction rash to the Imse Vimse flushable diaper liners I had purchased last week. I noted that his foreskin was red and swollen due to this reaction and that I stopped using the liners Friday and by that evening there was dramatic improvement.

One of our ER nurses decides she is going to force his foreskin back to clean under it with a wet rag. She ordered a nurse in training to wet a rag and dab his penis while she attempted to force back his foreskin. I pushed her hand away from his penis and said "don't try to pull back his foreskin" she firmly replaced her hand, blocking my view of his penis and replied "I have to". I pushed her hand off again and grabbed him up.

The doctor walked in just then and says the rash looks like an allergic reaction he needs a dose of steroids and he'll be fine. The doctor leaves and the nurse comes back in. She stands very close to me, and over me putting her hands in towards my face and condescendingly tells me that retraction and cleaning must be done. I told her that was incorrect information because you should never try and force back a foreskin to clean under it. She lifted her hands to my face, sighed heavily, rolled her eyes and left. At this point I believe that I am going to get the antibiotics for my son's 105 fever and be out of there quickly but sadly my struggle was just beginning. At this point I note a spot of blood on R's foreskin that was not there before.

The other nurse then comes in and tells me the same thing about cleaning under his foreskin, bringing along a print out about foreskin care. I argue that her method is incorrect and this can easily be proved with research. I told her I have a ten year old son at home and know very well how to take care of a penis. Her reply is that I "got lucky" with the older child that he never had any problems with my lack of hygiene. She says I should have been forcing it back and cleaning under it all along and because I have not been that is poor hygiene which is medical neglect and she is calling DCFS to report me.

I jumped on my phone to have DH come to assist and also contacted as many people as I could to figure out a way to prove to these people that it is accepted medical knowledge that you never force back an infant's foreskin to try and clean under it and in fact attempting to do so causes bleeding, infection, scar tissue and permanent damage.

A nurse in another town called me and offered to fax over the official AAP (American Academy of Pediatrics) sheet on proper foreskin care which backs up my claims saying you should never force it back and that it is extremely rare for an infant to be retractable. Cleaning is not necessary until it separates on it's own in which case a child is usually the first person to retract his OWN foreskin.

I asked to speak to the DOCTOR because he didn't seem to have any issues at all with my past or future care of R's penis and had stated that it was an allergic rash, not a rash from improper hygiene. Interestingly it was never mentioned by anyone that the rash had anything to do with his fever which was the reason for the ER visit. In fact during the entire visit no one speaks of the extremely high fever and lethargy he had been suffering from.

We wait there for about 2.5 hours while the DCFS caseworker is dispatched at which point I did think about leaving but I needed the antibiotics for R's extremely high fever which I was not willing to wait several more hours to attempt to get treatment somewhere else since his lethargy was quite scary to me. He is suffering this whole time while I wait for DCFS to investigate me for "medical neglect" which I find so ironic. I can barely keep him awake during this time. No one comes into the room during this time to check on him or us.

The nurse and caseworker come in and the nurse tells me that I cannot speak with the doctor I am going to speak to her instead. It is my understanding that it is my right as a patient to speak to a doctor about my child's care. The CW asks me why I need to see the doctor. They are acting like I am doing something wrong by demanding to talk to the doctor. I tell the CW what happened and the nurse read PARTS of the AAP page. Just the parts that seemed to back her up such as (after the child is older and it retracts on it's own instruct him to) retract and clean under it. She claimed that my son was one of the rare babies who is retractable so therefore I must retract and clean under it. She is wrong. This was proved at the end of the visit when the doctor looked at his penis again. The nurse leaves but I offer for her to keep the AAP page but she refuses. Apparently she has no interest at all in educating herself which is shocking.

I do finally flag he doctor to come back in, he looks at the rash, we agree that a little OTC hydrocortisone cream and it will be just fine nothing more needed. The CW witnesses this. This seemed to totally contrast what the nurses are saying but then he didn't/wouldn't directly say that they had done or said anything wrong either. Seemed he just wanted nothing to do with our predicament.

DH and I are interviewed and told DCFS will be out to inspect our home. After four hours we finally get the antibiotic for R that we came for. Diagnosis is balantitis, inflammation of the urethra. Which to me is no explanation for the fever and lethargy and hardly related to the reason why we came in which was not diaper rash.

Once I refused forced retraction, which was only minutes into my visit, all their energy went into going after me with DCFS. R's medical care was completely thrown aside. His ears were never looked in, he was never looked at other than the diaper rash and a listen to his lungs by the nurse. They never asked how high his fever had gotten or how abnormal he was acting nor did I have time to explain actual pertinent information to them since I spent all of my time trying argue with their incorrect claims. No one spoke to me about post care such as keeping an eye out for other symptoms, increased fever, allergic reaction to the abx etc. I never got a chance to adequately speak to the doctor about the reason for the antibiotic or making sure it was an infection and not a virus. I left feeling like he had received totally sub par care.

Calling in DCFS only postponed his treatment and made the visit very confusing for everyone thus impeding his medical care and taking my attention as well as the nurse and doctor's attention away from HIM where it should have stayed all along.

Per the information DCFS gave me, if a call is made to them it is then decided if there is adequate reason to send out an investigator. I am very curious how, when the nurse had the AAP paper in her hand, she was still able to come up with adequate reason to waste an investigator's time.

It is reliably backed up in medical literature that forced retraction is harmful, causes infections, scar tissue, long term damage and I really want to make sure this isn't done to other babies. Babies of moms who maybe wouldn't slap a nurses' hand off their child. First do no harm, right?

What is the greatest danger to an intact boy? Uneducated medical staff.

Goals:
For both nurses to be reprimanded for their lack of respectful thoughtful care, total unwillingness to educate themselves and desire to call DCFS as a first response to a disagreement with a parent.

For the hospital to educate their staff on the normal development of the penis and foreskin and it's proper care.

For the hospital to hand out the AAP page on foreskin care for children.

Yellow Mum

2011-10-21T08:28:00.000-07:00

Another pretty fall picture from DS9, budding photographer. Taken with Nikon CoolPix.

Happy 10 Months on Earth

2011-10-19T10:24:00.000-07:00

Happy 10 months on Earth sweet baby RoRo. This morning he waited next to me in bed as I slowly woke up. He climbed into my lap and insisted that I snuggle him. His body still soft, conforming to mine, wholly accepting of my touch. I think he was saying "momma, I won't be little for very long, hold me just a little longer".

Stats:
Weight 21.5 pounds 55th percentile
Length: 28 inches 23rd percentile

Milestones:
Takes several steps unassisted.
Feeds self table foods.
Holds toy phone to ear.
Pats head a lot...I think he is jealous of other people's hair.
Points to things using whole hand.
Will look at or fetch a ball when asked.
Throws a ball.
Understands to climb down stairs or off furniture feet first.
Seems to say appropriates names Mama, Dada, Bubba.
Plays well alone.
Opens cabinets and explores.
Starting to understand not to bang people in the head with hands or objects.
Gives kisses!

Loves:
Apples, eggs, chicken, fish, rice, oatmeal, cheese, green beans.
Banging a piano.

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day from an Atheist Perspective

2011-10-16T11:01:00.000-07:00

October 15th is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness day. I was perusing a great Facebook page called Grief Beyond Belief and some of the stories and blogs shared there about baby loss. It sure is hard to find non religious ways of dealing with baby loss or any loss for that matter. Dealing with the loss of a loved one is one of the intimidating parts of becoming Atheist. How do you deal with loss when you don't believe that that person goes on living in some other place? And what if that person is your child?

The truth is, our loss was very difficult when I was still attempting to deal with it from a faithful perspective. Constantly feeling that our children were taken from us by God for some unknown reason was nothing short of torture. It wasn't until I released myself from religion that I was finally able to accept their death, why they died and how to move on. It was then that I started living life to the fullest and being truly happy. Once you stop thinking about afterlife THIS life seems so much more important. It's all perspective.

One of the things that makes you an atheist is a lack of belief in the supernatural. I don’t believe in a next life where I can make up for the things I missed in this one. My Dad… my Uncle Al (not this Uncle Al, but just as cool), Glando… many others. Eventually everyone will be stripped away from us. Raising Hellions

It was quotes similar to that one in Parenting Beyond Belief: On Raising Ethical, Caring Kids Without Religion that changed my world, my perceptions and the way I live my life forever.

For more truths about the days following a baby loss read:

My Stillborn Child's Life after Death

The Heartbreak of Infant Loss

10 Months

2011-10-14T12:16:00.000-07:00

Ten months old already! I can't believe my baby is so big so fast. Already eating apples and taking five steps on his own. So much personality coming out now. Ro is a very special little boy.

More Fall Activities

2011-10-11T12:05:00.000-07:00

More fall madness around here! Taking advantage of the amazing weather and color! My nine year old took these pictures <3

We are reading a huge stack of books from the library on fall. All about the history of the Halloween, pumpkin life cycles (with field trip to pumpkin farm) and all about how wasps and birds survive the winter. What foods are harvested in the fall. Collecting black walnuts and acorns for our nature table. We sang goulish songs, jumped into the leaf pile and are planning a Halloween party for our friends (list making, grocery shopping, researching). This weekend we're taking advantage of the color and taking a cruise on a steam boat! Next week, the apple orchard. More activities to come! (homeschooling is awesome)

Simple fall crafts

Fall sensory bin

Fall beverages

No bake pumpkin pie in a cup

Embracing Autumn

2011-10-06T19:44:00.000-07:00

We had the most beautiful fall hike today. ODS took about 100 photos and I took plenty myself. Peak color should be here in a week or two but the nature preserve is already looking majestic. Success, for me, is not making a lot of money. Success is watching my 9 year old in complete awe of the beauty of falling leaves.

New Fluffies

2011-10-05T13:01:00.000-07:00

Aren't these beautiful. Twelve hand dyed prefitted diapers from Tinkle Traps. Love. I also purchased some hand knitted longies. Festive orange and cable knit kelly green. What a good mail day!

Non Messy Snacks for a 9 Month Old

2011-09-16T14:59:00.000-07:00

Ro turns 9 months old today! I was fully prepared to do a photo shoot today but three things got in my way. Firstly he fell this morning and got a goose egg on his forehead. Secondly, he is active and most pictures are blurry pictures of the back of his head/body. Thirdly, it's rainy so the light isn't co operating to make pretty pictures. Today he is wearing his recycled wool sweater booties and bib overalls I made him, so cute and warm.

I've been searching for tasty, non choking, not horribly messy snacks that are healthy.. Something I could keep in my diaper bag or cupboard just for him. Traditional suggestions are:
Cereals, puffed grains like Cheerios, crackers (not nutritious)
Nuts, dried fruit or trail mix (choking)
Fresh fruit (good snack but somewhat messy, goes bad)
Cheese cubes and beans (good snacks, slightly messy, goes bad)

As an alternative I've been trying out various kinds of freeze dried foods from companies like Just Tomatoes ETC. We tried the fruit salad and blueberries. Some of the blueberries were very hard, some where airy or chewy and they also turn your hands purple so those would not be my first choice. The fruit salad had small chunks so they would be messier, harder to hold onto and also more of a choking hazard. I found that the Just Peaches were the perfect shape for Ro to told onto and had a great texture. They are easy to gum and not crumbly. I assume the Just Apples would be very similar. I think some of the other fruits, corn and peas would be good choices too as he gets older.

I'm interested in other healthy snacks for the young toddler. What do you use?

2011-09-09T22:40:00.000-07:00

Check out our little pre-walker!

This week:

Enjoying the slightly chilly weather. Soup was had no less than three times.

Organizing my sewing table. I have plenty of projects to start on. Sewing recycled wool winter booties, hats, gloves and pants. Things for Ro's birthday!

Gearing up to start N's preschool projects. Check out this article What Should a 4 Year Old Know?

Clearing out the dressers and starting a give away pile.

Sports day: learning how to play kickball.

"Not Back to School" homeschool party.

Filling out the kids' amazon christmas wishlist. Found lots of great open ended things.

Birthday (mine)

2011-09-04T14:50:00.000-07:00

Or.... I just found a plastic peg from our Battleship game in my baby's poop... You choose.

When I was young I watched this show called Thirtysomething and thought those people were SUPER OLD. Thirty two really isn't old though. FYI. I don't have wrinkles or grey hair.

The best way to spend a special day is with friends and family and I managed to do both. I received a couple practical gifts like a new stereo to replace my broken one and GPS for my car so my driving experience will be much better now with tunes and less driving around aimlessly because I suck at roads and directionality and stuff. C made me a necklace with some of the drift wood we picked up on the north west coast and he was so proud of himself. <3

We went to a museum about Abe Lincoln and even though it was set up all confusing and pretty boring and the kids didn't get much out of it it was still kind of fun. In the car afterwards C opened up a copy of a civil war map he got at the gift shop exclaiming "COOL"! And it made my day. Reasons to homeschool numbers 900 and 901: your kid is actually super enthusiastic about learning and you GET TO SEE IT!

Also, I had all you can eat sushi buffet!

I awoke to a beautiful chilly September day and it was a great sign of a great year to come!

Turn Your Frown Upside Down!

2011-09-01T13:58:00.000-07:00

or How to Turn a Bad Day into a Good Day. There is actually an Ehow on this.

Today was the last day we could visit the beach, which is about 15 minutes from our house, because it closes by Labor Day. The forecast said it would be 100 but I didn't let that stop me from dragging three kids out to get all sandy and hungry and grumpy. Taking a baby to the beach is a total headache. Add in a toddler and a nine year old who is apparently deaf unless you say "ice cream".

We lasted an hour before they both decided not to follow my rules so I had to play mean mom and take them home. And I was ticked. Because it takes all morning to get everything ready, the time and gas to travel, admission to the beach, picking up some sub sandwiches on the way, getting everything dirty and sandy.

I felt a little guilty coming home and plopping in front of Facebook after sticking DD in bed. DD took her "rest time" which is NOT nap time but similar and the boys played and the baby ignored me for once and I chatted with my friends and read all about the babies who were up every hour last night, the ones who won't give mom a moment to herself and I know that time is coming for Ro, he must be a late bloomer, and I got all giddy about the $100 I just spent on new cloth diapers which are going to be so pretty I'm probably going to sleep with them for a while.

And there it went. I didn't feel unhappy at all anymore. Actually I feel pretty grateful. Because ODS was pretty awesome at the beach today. He went in and bought our sandwiches so I didn't have to get the youngers out of the car and he carted around all our junk and I didn't hear any complaining. Then he came home and played with Ro for an hour and they were both truly in love like brothers can be. And N laid down for a full hour today without crying. The house is clean. There is still a cup of coffee left in the pot (love that). So many other awesome things. So we watched a video. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mZ89rldSSKw

So here's an update on ODS. No less than two months ago I was at the end of my rope pretty much gathering names of children's homes where I could drop him off. DH took him to our family doctor (a D.O.) and it became clear that they were going to give us two choices. Either deal with it or give him ritalin. I wasn't happy with that so I took him to our naturopath who ran some biofeedback test that totally sounds like hocus pocus and prescribed him two supplements. One has beets which is supposed to correct the low gall bladder function the machine says he has and the other is an essential fatty acid supplement which is good for all people but especially ADHD kids. The machine also said he is intolerant (not allergic) to 30 different foods and he wants us to avoid the top 15 foods. The foods are weird. Like horseradish and asparagus.

I have to say I've noticed a pretty remarkable difference though. He doesn't get as worked up about things (he would get totally hysterical and violent before) and he has done all of his school work assignments for two weeks (trying some "structured" school)! He wouldn't even sit down and try before. Maybe we "scared him straight" finally or maybe he knows we are trying to work with him or maybe he just didn't think he had any issues until a doctor told him so. He is super about taking his supplements and following the diet! I hope things keep improving.

Birthday Cake

2011-08-29T21:00:00.000-07:00

Happy birthday to our sweet daughters Abby and Emma born seven years ago. Our tradition is making a cake together. We try a different type of cake every year. C wanted to make this fancy three layer black forest chocolate cake with cherries and fresh whipped cream. It came out beautiful! Thanks to all who remembered us today.

More Art

2011-08-10T14:37:00.000-07:00

Can you say "over an hour of quiet painting"? This one goes in the record book.

I could write a big long post about the importance of taking your prenatal vitamins while tandem nursing but I will spare you. Suffice it to say I've been so very run down lately and struggled with some kind of infection possibly strep for 2.5 weeks. I'm feeling better and getting ready for fall season. So popular here in pumpkin country. Too bad the beetles ate up my apple trees this year. No cider for me.

School work. Well I'm leaning towards unschooling this year. As much as I'd like to be all super schooly and sit around talking about the 100 different types of curriculum we use and how I'm a hard nosed teacher and my kid is going to Harvard when he's 12 and he plays the violin like a bad ass (but secretly hates it) I'm going to have to trade in my sandals for Birkinstocks and just let him do his thing.

Making Lacto Fermented Cucumbers [Real Pickles]

2011-08-04T09:42:00.000-07:00

I love this vintage veggie slicer. N had a lot of fun slicing and filling the jars and filling with brine. These are traditional fermented probiotic containing dill pickles. I used cucumbers, onions and garlic from the farmer's market. For the brine I used some seasoned already cultured liquid from my kimchi (because I didn't want to dig to find my whey), spring water, dill and a little salt. They have a nice mild flavor without the super sweet/vinegar. If you don't make your own you can buy Bubbies pickles at some stores.

It was all fun until the fourth jar went SPLAT on the stone tile floor. Tomorrow, making the cabbage I grew into sauerkraut and cole slaw.

Arts and Crafts

2011-07-29T13:20:00.000-07:00

I've really gotten into sensory exploration art with the kids this month. I've been trying out the ideas at Play at Home Mom.

Sticky Paint Sticky Body Paint!

Puffy Paint

Squishy Bag I liked this more than the kids did!

Tissue Paper Ideas

Tin Foil Painting

Shaving Cream Paint/Body Painting with Shaving Cream

Melted Crayon Designs

Spice Art. N loved this. Loved smelling all my spices and then sprinkling them on glue/paper. Then mixing them all in a bowl to make a secret potion.

Playing with cornstarch. Feeling it dry and making Oobleck.

Secret message painting. Write a message in white crayon and have them paint over it.

Fizzy paint. Baking soda and paint plus a squirt bottle of vinegar.

The messier the better!

Baby Cakes

2011-07-24T10:54:00.000-07:00

Cooking for baby: 7 months old (a series with pictures).

Pumpkin Pancakes

He ate about six of these baby cakes.

Pumpkin is really a health food. And pancakes are fun to pick up and easy to eat for a seven month old. For these I actually used part stone ground corn meal and wheat flour but many other grain variations work.

By far Sue Gregg's blender batter pancakes are the best! Using 100% whole grains, fresh ground and soaked, pastured eggs, real butter and maple syrup. For pumpkin pancakes just add a half cup organic pumpkin pie filling or in the fall we have fresh pumpkin pie filling.

Cooking for Baby

2011-07-24T10:35:00.000-07:00

This week I really enjoyed making a few healthy special foods for Ro. He loved these!

Cooking for baby: 7 months old (a series with pictures).

Stewed Prune Oatmeal

Start out with some organic oat groats. I don't see whole unrefined oat groats often but then we don't have much for bulk food or health food stores. You may have to settle with steel cut oats. I love the nutty slightly chewy texture of whole oat groats! They do take a long time to cook so many times I grind them up a bit in the blender just before cooking so they cook faster.

Put a cup of these in the blender and grind them into a flour. At this point you can add a little water and a dab of kefir and soak them overnight. I don't always remember to soak my grains.

In the morning add the necessary water for cooking and a few prunes. Cook until thick and bubbly.
After that I returned it to the blender with a generous dose of grass fed butter to break up the prunes and make it all nice a creamy. This was the result.

This was the first time I heard him say MMMMMMMM.

It's Over 100F

2011-07-21T13:00:00.000-07:00

It's been a heat index around 115F for at least a week now. So this post by Money Saving Mom got me thinking about our new silicone push pop molds and how much my kids are enjoying them. This is nine bucks well spent! They also seem to be less messy than popsicles on a stick. The kids will love those chocolate pudding pops.

Right now they're enjoying some fresh lemon juice, water and honey pops (our homemade lemon-aid). Last week it was blueberries, banana and milk kefir. Half orange juice half coconut milk and vanilla extract makes a great creamcicle. I need to venture out and make some new ones.

First Birthday Plans

2011-07-20T19:49:00.000-07:00

This probably comes as no surprise because you know I love vintage cowboy stuff but I bought some decorations for Ro's first birthday months ago and it will be a cowboy themed party. I'm looking around for additional decor, outfits (maybe all three kids could match!) and cowboy themed gifts.

See my Cowboy Theme First Birthday Etsy treasury here.

Baby Food

2011-07-16T10:23:00.000-07:00

Ro turns seven months old today. He is definitely acting hungry wanting solids 1-2 times a day. I decided to make him up a few quick purees in the event I didn't have anything else on hand for him that was appropriate (healthy, fresh, salt free, able to grab). He seems to like a few bites of this but also demands real food he can grab and gnaw like some big chunk of meat or steamed veggie. I appreciated the second hand baby jars given to me :) I put these in the freezer and they thaw out in an hour or so.

Green: pork and mixed veggies

Purple: Blueberries and brown rice

Orange: Sweet potato, chicken, brown rice

Finger painting with blueberries/brown rice puree.

Recommended age to start solids:

1920s 7 months

1930s 4-6 months

1950s 4-6 weeks

It's easier for them to self feed if sitting on the floor.

I haven't found anything he dislikes. Some favorites are sweet potato, fish, oven fries, rice, scrambled eggs, peaches, meat balls, bratwurst... Yeah, love the fresh brats from the meat locker.

A Day in the Life

2011-07-12T09:00:00.000-07:00

Project: A Day in the Life.

A very hot Monday. Heat index 115F. We slept in so late. Too hot and muggy for our usual Monday picnic with friends.

9:30 Coffee and school.

Homeschool. Grade 4 review. First time he has done schoolwork without screaming in months. 4 pages. Three 100% and one 83%. Then he read a book about Thomas Edison. N did a couple pages in her preschool book.

10:00 Ro gets up

Play time

He pretended to be our friend the tattoo artists who has dreads.

11:30 Lunch. Egg/tuna salad, blue berry smoothies.

12:30 - 2 pm Naptime for Ro while I read online and the older kids play a video game.

1:30 Read to N

2 pm He always wakes up happy.

Playing, practicing crawling.

3:30-4 second nap for Ro

Got the new Clue game out

4:30-5 Temper tantrum. Only one today!

5-6 Make chicken quesadillas with guacamole, re heated veggies.

6:30-7:30 Finally cool enough to go outside and have water play time.

I ended up putting the nozzle on the hose to get the kids which totally backfired because they got both hoses going and totally and unrelentingly drenched me.

7:30-8:15 third nap for Ro. Watch TV.

9 pm Send older kids to bed. Have a bit of time with Ro before he falls asleep.

Three Kids and a 5th Wheel

2011-07-06T16:16:00.000-07:00

It's a small space but our kids love it! Our rig: 2004 30 foot Jayco Eagle 5th wheel camper. Includes a master bedroom with queen bed, two small closets, one large hallway closet, under bed storage/lift up bed, TV shelf, more storage over the bed. Bathroom with lots of linen storage, full vanity with medicine cabinet, camper toilet and a shower/small bathtub. Main room includes a jack knife sleeper sofa, dinette for four, three burner propane stove top, small oven, 6 cubic foot electric or propane fridge and freezer combo, sink and lots of storage for food, dishes, misc supplies, area for TV, books, games. Back bedroom has bunk beds, dresser, closet. We have several "basement" areas including one that holds the litter box for our two cats and is accessible from the inside. We have one central air conditioning unit and we are wired for cable TV or digital antenna. We have our own wireless internet. We pull it with a 2001 Ford F 350 dually diesel quad cab truck.

Racing Snail

2011-07-05T21:33:00.000-07:00

We found a friendly racing snail. This little snail completely tolerated being handled and was obviously just as curious about N as she was about it.

I need a vacation from my vacation

2011-06-28T14:31:00.000-07:00

I'm pretty sure I'm going to gain twenty pounds before we get back. Huge drawback about RV living; it's a very small space. Taking three steps to get to the bathroom or kitchen and spending 10 minutes a day cleaning, while it is nice it is also about a thousand times less activity than living in a two story, four bedroom stick house. I can only walk around the campground so many times! Can't wait for J to get these jobs done so we can take an actual RV vacation. We are spending the fourth of July at Lake of the Ozarks! Should be fun and beautiful. Lets hope.

Ro is enjoying peach season. He displayed clear dislike for canned guacamole. He has sophisticated taste buds like his mother apparently.

C is really into rocks, thinks he has found some valuable crystals and can't wait to go visit the Gem and Mineral museum.

N found some old troll dolls at a junk shop and has been very attached to them.

Rainy Days in the RV

2011-06-25T09:08:00.000-07:00

We were supposed to have a family day of exciting site seeing today but the rain interfered. Scholastic storybook treasures to the rescue! Love these DVDs.

Enjoying the Peace

2011-06-24T10:04:00.000-07:00

Here it's cool and refreshing. Intoxicating. The type of weather that makes you want to take a nap. Too bad I didn't pack any coats, long pants or long sleeve shirts for anyone. I didn't pack much at all. I'm guilty of severe minimalism.

It's good for your soul to feel uncomfortable for a bit. I'm so sick of using disposable toilet paper! There I confessed. And the food. Oh the food. I guess I was used to elaborate meals. None of that now.

I'm trying not to feel guilty for laying around watching movies with the youngers. We should be outside enjoying the break in the heat. Lazy mornings turn into lunchtime so easily.

C has been working all week, painting and scrubbing along side his dad. Makes him act so grown up. I'm only 31, I feel too young to have a child already growing so much less dependent on me. Parents, babyhood is so short! Those times when you're putting on shoes and reading them stories at bedtime don't last long at all. It makes me appreciate little Ro and oftentimes I hug him tight and tell him never to grow up.

Work less. Enjoy more.

Missouri, First Stop

2011-06-20T13:45:00.000-07:00

We arrived in Missouri Saturday evening. It's a shady state park campground with a little playground right next to our site. Opportunities for hiking, fishing and swimming. The place was packed with weekenders and tons of kids.

Sunday we concluded Father's day with some adult time, brews around the campfire (love it) and had the campgrounds to ourselves. The racoons were running around cleaning up the bits of food left from the hoards of people.

Today it's HUMID. I decided to finally roll out of bed though I think J turned off the AC thinking the growing heat would make me want to get up.... J ran off to work. I got the baby on my back, we grabbed our fishing polls and headed towards the lake but didn't make it far before we got hungry and soaked in sweat. I decided it would be a lot more enjoyable to come home and enjoy the air conditioning while we watch Spiderman 3 for the 100th time.

I spent the day learning how to manage in the camper again. Baby Ro plays happily on the floor. Our 272 square feet feels pretty huge to me right now. Loving our new vinyl faux hardwood flooring. So clean looking. Thank you hubby!

Readjusting to the tiny fridge not going so well. Already got looks from the three full timing retired couples at the front of the park. Crazy dreadlocked hippie RVing family! Doesn't help that C looks homeless all the time (his choice). At least he has shoes on today. WE ALL HAVE SHOES ON!

Later this evening, making potatoes on the fire, fishing, showers. Tomorrow swimming at the beach.

Six Month Photo Shoot

2011-06-16T20:32:00.000-07:00

My adorable little man. I can't believe he's already six months!

Lava Lamp in a Box

2011-06-13T09:14:00.000-07:00

One plastic tub, water, oil, food coloring. Three days of fun.

Busy week of outside activities. Giant blow up water slides. Bonfires. Brats. Smores. Painting with preschoolers. Water play. Cleaning and remodeling the camper. Falling off the trampoline. ER visits. Heh.

Memorial Day '11

2011-05-31T18:04:00.000-07:00

I woke up early anticipating a super hot day. We were outside painting and playing in the hose by 9. Don't ask why N has her floatie vest on. They were so excited about the public pools opening! We painted with shaving cream + paint. Most of which went on their bodies, clothes, hair and grass and almost none of which went on the paper. The kids had a ball mixing it up with their hands and rubbing it all over themselves and then spraying off with the hose. Afterwards we visited friends, swam at their pool and enjoyed a Mediterranean dinner.

My happy little strawberry blonde boy.

Natural Tree Branch Blocks

2011-05-28T21:12:00.000-07:00

The benefits of being married to a carpenter. A large set of natural tree branch blocks, sanded and oiled for N's birthday. I love these! The color, texture and warmth. Perfect for building fairy castles.

Fourth Birthday

2011-05-23T06:18:00.000-07:00

Well the proposed rapture fell on my little girl's birthday so I'm pretty glad it didn't come. We spent the weekend camping at a pioneer village infested with clouds of mosquitoes (ugh) but it was a beautiful place and the weather was perfect. I do plan to go back when the bugs are better. I woke up twice in the middle of the night and just listened to the absolute silence. C did the usual thing he usually does which is chopping at wood with the hatchet for hours.

First Birthday

First Foods

2011-05-15T17:04:00.000-07:00

Ro exploring a bite of potato.

Happy 5 months on Earth. He has recently hit all the requirements for solids: sitting up unassisted, feeding himself and loosing tongue thrust reflex. AKA Baby Led Weaning.

Ro's current nursing necklace (what he plays with while nursing). Wool yarn, maple teething ring and my mother's day present; hand blown glass (dreadlock) bead in Ro's birth stone color with his initial "R". Beautiful swirly blue green colors.

If cold December gave you birth,
The month of snow and ice and mirth,
Place on your hand a turquoise blue;
Success will bless whate'er you do.

How does our garden grow?

2011-05-12T12:06:00.000-07:00

For the moment...yes. It's still there. It has yet to explode. I'm dreading garden failure. I really know so little about gardening though this is my fourth or fifth year. Thank you to my darling who put up three raised beds for us and filled them with rich soil..installed the rain barrel (squee!) and got me a drum for a compost turner. We have:
"Pickles" cucumbers
Cherry tomatoes
Two types of large tomatoes
Brussel sprouts
Celery
Two types of lettuce
Spinach
Peas
Green Cabbage (looking forward to lacto fermented homemade cole slaw!)
Watermelon
And soon to be herb garden.

I could easily plant 1-2 more beds. Also, vermicomposting (worms) is looking really interesting. C cannot stop talking about all the twenty pound watermelons we're going to be eating! I'm looking forward to feeding little Ro his first foods; tender and fresh from the garden.

Mother's Day 2o11

2011-05-08T20:19:00.000-07:00

Enjoying a beautiful day in the yard with Mister I Can Sit, Mister Plays with Hose on Trampoline and Miss I Can Use the New Garden Watering Can to Make Everything Wet. Bought plants. Gardened. Ate sandwiches.

Photography Project: Hats

2011-05-05T12:05:00.000-07:00

Vintage baby love

Morel Season

2011-05-05T08:02:00.000-07:00

This was our appetizer last night. It's like a morel doughnut. Delightful. We also did slices of portabello mushrooms. Amazing, cripsy, sweet/salty, earthy.

For the batter I used
2 farm fresh eggs, beaten
about 3/4 cup biscuit mix, I actually used Bob's red mill gluten free pancake mix.
1/2 tsp sea salt
about 1/2 cup milk kefir. You could also use buttermilk or just milk.
Mix batter. Coat mushrooms well. Deep fry.

Easter Bunny Pie

2011-04-24T16:05:00.000-07:00

Have you ever had Easter Bunny Pie?

Easter Egg Bread Braid

We made beef tallow cuppie cake candles to burn during our delicious Easter dinner.

We tried to dye eggs with berries (which sort of worked) and spinach (not so much), regular food dye and we added colored sugar sprinkles.

The cutest easter bunny of all.

Cesarean Recovery Update - 4 Months

2011-04-19T13:55:00.000-07:00

Baby Ro just turned four months! After talking with a friend about placentophagy I was inspired to reflect upon my recovery. My third cesarean went off without a single hitch. The blessing of that is not lost on me. I did a lot of physical and emotional preparation for my birth and was fully aware of the possibility of complications. I was fortunate enough to have an emotionally positive birth with no apparent complications, a very fast recovery and a great baby!

Preparing for my birth:
Collected information on all birth options; providers and hospitals available to me.
Met with more than one provider to discuss previous births, their philosophies and options for me.
Weighed all options; considered financial, emotional and physical health outcomes.
Developed a detailed birth plan to identify things I liked and didn't like about my previous births.
Refined birth plan and discussed concerns with my provider until I felt comfortable.
Made arrangements to make my post partum period easier.
Acted as an advocate for myself to ensure my wishes were carried out.

Physically, it's important to go into surgery as healthy as possible. I saw a naturopath and evaluated my nutritional stores. After surgery, it's important to rest and eat warming foods like stews, soups and homemade porridge and breads. I kept the wound dry with a hair dryer and applied a homemade healing tincture of calendula and comfrey. I alternated application of cold pressed coconut oil which is antifungal. I kept fermented probiotic foods in my diet and followed up with my naturopath.

As far as placentophagy, I had my placenta steamed with ginger and lemon, dried, ground up and encapsulated. I started taking my capsules a few days after the birth. I can't really say if the hormones and nutrients contained in those capsules were responsible for my ultra fast, easy recovery. I hesitate to admit to doing anything that could be deemed spiritual but seeing and holding this life giving home was an amazing experience that every mother should have the option to enjoy. I do believe that a combination of having an empowered birth and the wonderful hormones in my placenta capsules led to me feeling even more connected to baby Ro. A happier, more energetic mom; that's a good reason to give placentophagy a try.

{violets}

2011-04-18T14:25:00.000-07:00

The yard has bloomed out with violets and dandelions. Little N already found a jar's worth of snails to call her "babies". Lots of fun on the trampoline, playing basketball and riding skates and scooters on the driveway. The raised garden .should. be planted in the next few days. Lettuce, spinach and peas. We have wildflower seeds to plant too. But for now, the big kids are gone and it's time to spend a day with the Tiny One.

2011-04-14T12:23:00.000-07:00

Life is a mess right now. I was glad to find a little peace yesterday at the children's museum. We happened to show up right after the field trips left so it was completely QUIET! Oh my luck! The kids spent the entire afternoon (3.5 hours, glad I didn't get a parking ticket) using up their craft supplies...they saw the properly displayed "project" and decided to make whatever they wanted instead. Oy, homeschoolers!

C made some kites out of string, paper plates, pipe cleaners, construction paper and lots of tape.

N set away with a brush in each hand so deliberate and concentrated and did this amazing rainbow tree!

We were there through two naps (see below, just before second nap), two diaper changes and one feeding.

So it was just like any other day; diaper, craft, snack, craft, nurse, paint, diaper.

Happy Birthday!

2011-04-10T21:05:00.000-07:00

My baby is nine! Wow. Fourth grade in the fall. He likes legos, pokemon, math and science. He loves to fish. This was his fishing birthday party! He made his own cake. He fashioned a fondant replica of himself sitting on the cake fishing.

Obligatory cute baby in sock monkey shirt and shorties pic.

We got him a basketball hoop. He also got a Nikon Cool Pix for his birthday and plans to open his own blog. Also some books, an erector set and a giant box of Popsicles. He plans to have a bad case of blue tongue all summer.

Making Toys at Home vol 1

2011-04-08T11:25:00.000-07:00

My new hobby is homemade toys. Here you see a fun sensory teether toy. A natural wood ring with knitted tags; soft as a cloud bamboo, bumpy cotton and scratchy undyed wool. You could get the tags wet and freeze if desired. Ro seems to love it.

Skate Park

2011-04-04T11:12:00.000-07:00

What a beautiful but windy weekend. The kids enjoyed many hours outside. Saturday Ro explored the trampoline, wind and sun on his face. The bigs played chase with their friends till dinner time.

C declared Sunday to be his very own day. Thermometer read 80 and it was windy enough to blow you over. His requests included visiting the skate park to work on his skills. New Heely shoes, Razor scooter and skateboard.

Afterwards I took C fishing. Just the two of us. It's fun hanging out with him. We both love to fish! Lots of people out fishing even though it was windy. I don't think the fish are biting quite yet.

Preschool

2011-03-29T10:42:00.000-07:00

Things are going well with our little waldorfish home preschool. I put the easel up and stocked the shelves with papers, paints, clays, egg cartons and other home refuse.

After breakfast we read a story. We enjoy some poems and songs. Then we paint, enjoy some free time and then lunch. C is doing his school work online in the morning. After lunch we go outside and then it's naptime for N and C enjoys his free time until his neighbor friend gets home from school. That's my schedule so far. The days will fill out more and more as it gets warmer. We're working on building the raised garden beds. We are also thinking of utilizing the chicken coop with actual chickens. I'm getting giddy thinking about enjoying homegrown chicken all year.

Spring Fling Tally Ho

2011-03-21T20:09:00.000-07:00

Chunky 14 pound 3 month old.

Enjoying a ride on daddy's back

We enjoyed our first park playdate and picnic of the year today. A little hike to absorb some nature with friends. Ro just had his three month growth spurt so he's not looking very newborn at all anymore. He came in at 14 pounds today but perhaps my scale is off. The other kids were 15 and 16 pounds at three months so that would make Ro my skinniest baby. Maybe he'll catch up with another growth spurt later this month.

Came home and had a creamy shrimp, bacon and cheese rue sauce over a bed of romaine salad greens. Decadent.

Check out this blog:

Nursing Two

2011-03-20T11:15:00.000-07:00

Recently I have really come into my role as milk machine. That is Tandem Nursing Mom. Mom of two nurslings. I never really thought I'd have the opportunity or that I would enjoy it at ALL.

Now, I've nursed through three pregnancies and it wasn't a pleasant experience. I felt *drained* a lot of the time. Just totally wiped out. I'll always have some negative emotions surrounding those months when I had a 35 pound two year old whom still got half of his calories from me and being pregnant with twins. I've never been so tired in my life. I knew some about nutrition but not enough.

The second time was only slightly easier. The third time, a little easier than that. It wasn't horrible. My naturopath said I needed these B vitamin pills and I take them still and I'm feeling really good. I was still fearing a point where I might suddenly hit the wall. It never really came.

Now that I've had a couple months to adjust I'm really enjoying tandeming. I'm nursing two and I pump 5 ounces a day to donate to a baby who needs it. It means I get really hungry. And then I eat a lot. Like I eat one meal, then I eat another meal.

And then I have a hot fudge sundae.

And I'm already wearing my pre pregnancy pants. So it's all worked out fine.

For more information about Tandem Nursing check out Nursing Two.

It's Sicky Week!

2011-03-19T12:42:00.001-07:00

It's sicky week! The week where we're all sick all the time. It's all about hacking and coughing and fevers that disappear and reappear.

What's got me perplexed is this; how can we go several years without illness and then this winter we were hit by the 12 hour stomach bug and now, what's most likely, RSV? I'm not sure what we did differently. I take it as a good sign that even with slight fevers, sneezing, runny noses and persistent cough the kids all act like they're totally fine.

Tomorrow is J's 33rd birthday so we're busy making a Guinness chocolate cake. C is in the garage building his gift.

I purchased a cart load of craft supplies from Hobby Lobby today. Hello Easter presents. When the craft bookcase is totally filled it will be a wonderland of free play crafting.

St. Patty's

2011-03-17T16:29:00.000-07:00

Wearing our green on St. Patty's Day

My cuddly baby boy is three months old. He's just starting to giggle and use his hands. The weather has been in the 60's and finally he's enjoying some sunshine. I think he's going to start talking soon. He enjoys pulling hair and passing gas. Also, things that crinkle and mobiles.

Gratitude

2011-03-14T20:02:00.000-07:00

We've been staying around the house mostly. Enjoying being lazy and playing inside while the weather is still in the mid 30's. Soaking up the last cozy days with the fireplace on, packing on the winter pounds.

I often feel irritated. The house is always a mess. A meal always needs cooking. Baby always needs fed just as I am hungry myself. The kids are always playing loudly while the baby is trying to sleep. They are always running in the house! Little N is always cutting things up with scissors, leaving tiny bit of paper everywhere. There are always legos and game pieces lying about all over the floor. N is always half naked with a skirt around her neck and gloves on her feet...

But alas; my kids let me sleep in till 9 (or later) every morning. They almost always devour my meals with glee; even when it has kale and onions in it. They play together all day depsite being 5 years apart in age. Learning is their delight. They pretend, they create, they craft, they build, they cook, they jump and run and ride outside. Great kid things that don't include much electricity. They help out a lot. They adore their little brother.

All in all I often wonder how they turned out so great. I am grateful. Expressing gratitude, every day, amidst the doldrum of chores, it's tough.

Spring

2011-03-01T14:56:00.000-08:00

Spring is exciting and frustrating. I'm excited to feel warmth, to feel the freedom of playing outside, wherever. Exploring the parks. Taking the kids on nature walks. Frustrating because spring brings changes, spring cleaning (mentally and physically). Spring also brings three out of five birthdays in this house.

So far C is getting a basketball hoop. N has a piggy bank and a leap pad game. They are both getting a new trampoline, a safer one. Not that old bent one with cigarrette burns in it that we found on the curb.

I've got a hundred tabs open researching preschool lessons because I feel like I need to do more for N at this point. C started online classes via Time 4 Learning so for the time being that's taking some of the pressure off me. I'm so glad that he loves it and asks to do his school work every day, usually twice a day. The lessons are fun little games and he can choose whatever lessons interests him that day. For N I purchased Practical Waldorf at Home Kindergarten with your Three to Six Year Old and am putting together a list of fun things we can do. Both kids have started form drawing.

Emotionally, I'm cleaning house. I'm desiring more peace in the home via rhythms but first I need a little more self discipline before I can adhere to more rhythm. I want to provide more planned lessons with the kids and be able to gently guide them through without feeling rushed or bored. I want to slow down. I want more communication.

I guess the kids won tickets to Madagascar Live tomorrow. Sounds exciting!

Staycation

2011-02-23T14:21:00.000-08:00

Well I'm back from my stay at home vacation. I had about 10 days of relaxation. We ate out. I cancelled my commitments. We stayed home and rested. Instead of cleaning I shopped.

Today was productive and relaxing. The two things I like to have in one day. Usually unattainable. Always enjoyable.

The kids did a little school work, played their own make believe games (together) and created a book together.

Ro dressed as a cowboy. A very sleepy cowboy. He didn't get many cows wrangled that's for sure.

I PRE prepared dinner during N's nap time. I used the last of our Thanksgiving dinner. Cranberry pork chops, cornbread stuffing, steamed cauliflower. And the special dish...the boys and I made deviled eggs together.

Later I'll make pumpkin currant muffins for our President's Day themed playgroup tomorrow. I'll have to wing the recipe since I just made it up. I love doing that. Fortunately, my kids will eat anything.

I got around to grocery shopping and menu planning finally.

This week's menu:

Monday: took the left over chicken and dumplings, tossed the dumplings and used the rest for a yummy chicken, vegetable, cheese casserole. Cleaned out the fridge of old leftovers, yay!

Tuesday: found "sliders" buns at the store on clearance, had to use them with our own yummy grass fed organic hamburger. Thanks a lot old Bessie! You were yummy.

Wednesday: Stated above.

Thursday: Shake and bake chicken with fresh asparagus.

Friday: Homemade hamburger helper with rice. Chicken livers for lunch!

Saturday: BBQ pork ribs, romaine and fresh strawberry salad

Sunday: homemade bread and lasagana. I'm using the organic cottage cheese from the freezer that has a weird texture. I guess you can't freeze cottage cheese.

Summer would be lovely

2011-02-11T20:32:00.000-08:00

Dread Baby

Over the past few weeks I've felt terribly over scheduled. I would love to attend every function, help everyone that needs help, keep an immaculate home and keep my sanity but it's all been stressing me out. I need to be home and just be. I need more peace. I need to learn how to do things for myself again. I found myself longing for the old days when I had no friends and no social life. So I've been scaling back commitments. I hope no one feels sore at me for it. I need to stay simple, flowing, unplanned. Can't wait to feel the warm sun again! Long dreamy summer days.

Gifts for Valentines

2011-02-02T13:36:00.000-08:00

Check out this super cute all natural bath and body gift set. Sparklehearts gift set.

Little Earths Beauty natural lip balm and glitter set.

My Valentine picks on Etsy. Chocolate lip gloss; it's my fave.

50 things to do during a blizzard

2011-02-01T23:57:00.000-08:00

The elfin child watches snowpocalypse.

My snowpocalypse began with a baby that slept till 10, a starbucks mocha and a donut from my favorite bakery thanks to my snow plow driving husband who got home at 8 am from plowing all night. He left again at 11 am and I won't see him till tomorrow morning. That's like 48 hours of plowing. I'm wondering why there are still people out on the roads. People. We knew about the snowpocalypse several days in advance but still you feel the need to run out to Walgreens (which is actually open).

Baked oatmeal. Coffee. Internet. C made lunch; grilled swiss on rye sandwiches. Tried form drawing with N. Spelling lesson for the big kid. Just being lazy. Watching Legend of the Guardians. That's about it for today. I'll cover the other 42 things on snowpocalypse Day two!

Project Diapers

2011-02-01T10:52:00.000-08:00

Oh my how cloth diapering has changed in the last nine years since I started. Nine years ago, without internet, I had extremely limited access to pre made cloth diapering products. The choices were Gerber burp cloth/diapers and PVC pull on pants. I managed to find some nylon cloth swimming diapers at the thrift stores which I used to cover my diapers to provide some water proof protection without using PVC. It wasn't mainstream information back then that PVC was dangerous. I eventually became privy to the joy of felted wool covers and that's how C ended his diapering career.

So here's our stash and our changing area. Not realizing what size baby I'd be having or how often I would have to wash my wool I, of course, over bought. I was aiming for several pairs of longies (long pants) and several pull on soakers or wraps in newborn size and the same numbers in size small. Now I also have collected several in medium. And I haven't even used up all those wool, cashmere and silk sweaters I bought months ago to turn into shorts, soakers and longies!

For diapers, you can see my favorites on top. My tie dyed Tinkle Traps. These are beautifully dyed cotton prefolds converted to a fitted diaper with a soaker sewn on top for faster drying that's topped in cotton velour. I plan to have my two dozen premium size prefolds converted in this way for when Ro is bigger.

Otherwise I'm using cotton fitteds (old style Kissaluvs) with a few bamboo fitteds (from Sassy Cloth) with hemp internal soakers. I choose snap fitted this time so they double as EC training pants.

Using all wool covers has been much easier than I expected. I only have to wash about one cover per week. These must be hand washed in warm and flat dried for about two days so you can see how the washing issue caused me to over buy and why some people have anxiety about using wool.

Wool has so many benefits besides being cute though! It absorbs 1/3 it's weight in fluid. That moisture evaporates which keeps the wool feeling dry. This makes them great for night time. They are breathable and antibacterial. Wool keeps the body warm in the winter and cool in the summer so it's great for all seasons. Wool stays smelling great, even when it's been peed in for days or weeks. You can find old wool sweaters at the thrift store for a buck or two. It's a great way to recycle. Or employ a mom by buying some hand knitted wool.

Smiles

2011-01-27T13:19:00.000-08:00

Ro is 6 weeks old today. We've been enjoying the first fleeting smiles. He's still a sleepy head. He still hasn't woken up at night yet. Just a grunt to let me know he'd like his 6 am snack. He visits with us for an hour (just long enough to take this pic) and then snoozes until afternoon. I'm guessing he's like most babies though and always demands to be fed right when I'm in the middle of cooking or eating dinner!

The big kids are hyper. They can't wait for spring.

Mid Winter

2011-01-20T13:52:00.000-08:00

Ro - 1 month

I think I've got the mid winter blues. I'm feeling overwhelmed this week. I feel anxious but incapable of action. I still see clutter in the home. The four seasons room which has actually become one huge mud room and the office which is over run with my unorganized paperwork and the children's craft supplies. Bits of paper and glue and crayons which are eternally scattered everywhere.

I'm feeling rather crushed with responsibility. My desk is piled with photos (expensive photos that I don't even know what to do with) and paperwork for the business. And I haven't even started our taxes yet! I'm really struggling with how to organize our business related papers and knowing exactly what or how to keep track of it.

Bills. Classes for the kids. A million different classes they could take. Shopping, menu planning, cooking (and the cleaning up after). Homeschooling. I'm trying to juggle everything and heal myself and nurse every hour. I wish I could walk away from half the responsibilities. I wish we still lived in the camper. I'm just hoping we can find a way to spend the warm months RVing. That life is so much more simple.

At the same time I'm thinking a lot about friendships. I need more meaningful relationships and conversations. I know that won't happen if we're on the road.

Maybe I'm just suffering from a bit of cabin fever from not being able to hang out outside. Maybe I've over scheduled myself. Maybe I've spread myself too thin trying to take care of everything for everyone.

I think I need some nutritious food, some meditation and some time alone. Maybe I need some sunshine. Maybe I will take the kids to Florida.

26 days

2011-01-11T11:55:00.000-08:00

Love this chubby baby picture! Ro is almost a month old. We made it through our first feeding frenzy aka growth spurt. I survived three days of non stop nursing and diaper changing. I think he *has* to be 11 pounds by now. Thankfully he's back to his usual sleeps-a-lot self.

I spend that time on homeschool, cooking and cleaning (and interneting). The house is clean and 90% organized. After having a baby and Christmas re-organizing was a chore.

We took half of the kids toys and put them in storage. Things seem much more manageable now. My goal is to keep out only a dozen toys each. We should weed out the books too.

So the playroom finally gets organized and I hear N in there talking and playing and then I look in to find that she's playing with a broken stick she found behind the furniture.... Not just a stick, a broken stick. And it's her new friend. So much for $80 waldorf dolls.

We've been attending our playgroups, the library and have eaten out a few times. It takes the five of us an hour to get out the door. If I'm the only parent it can take twice as long! I've decided to back off on appointments for a while.

N has slept in her own bed all night for several nights now. She got to have a special outing to celebrate and chose Godfather's Pizza, for the ball pit of course.

I saw the chiro/naturopath and got an A+ on my report card. All my organs are working apparently.

Physically and emotionally things are just great. I still need to clean up my diet a bit and get more exercise. But who doesn't?

18 days

2011-01-03T12:50:00.000-08:00

Wow. Wait. It can't be 18 days already! Right about now I'm wondering how long it will take to get back to my normal routines. How long until I actually want to run errands with three kids. How long until I resume doing the weekly meal menus and shopping on top of all the homeschooling, cooking, cleaning and organizing. Even though Ro is an easy baby I'm still feeling shocked when I don't get lunch on the table until 1 pm.

Today I played homeschool catch up. Trying to figure out where we left off and how I will approach the next 30 days. We will be studying very early North American explorers and the periodic table.

Little N is still feeling insecure. She says she's scared of the dark. Scared of shadows of strange people that might come in our house. She wants my attention, wants me to spend a lot more time with her than usual. She had some accidents and is very insistent on sleeping in our bed (the little bed next to our bed isn't good enough for her).

C is an awesome big brother. He loves holding, rocking and playing with Ro and even loves changing his clothes and diapers, though not that keen on the poopy ones.

I'm still in winter mode, hibernating in front of the fireplace and drinking far too much coffee.

Day 13

2010-12-29T09:57:00.000-08:00

The first two weeks have flown by. Our little boy has already started to fill out. He's gained a pound in the last 10 days. His newborn portraits have been taken. His umbilical cord stump fell off yesterday. His eyes are open for longer stretches as each day comes. He's keeping the same schedule thankfully sleeping well all night.

J went back to work today. I'm feeling energetic and N is still sleeping (it's 11 am)! Ro has been his usual awesome self staying awake for 30 minutes during my breakfast, nursing, sleeping, diaper change, back to sleep... C brought me his new Brain Quest cards (thanks Grandma) and asked to start school. Aren't homeshool kids great? So I guess it's December 29th, time to get Back to School!

N decided she wants to take a ballet/tap introduction class for preschoolers. Next month she will take swimming.

C decided he wants to take basketball.

Christmas Eve

2010-12-24T15:15:00.000-08:00

Our Christmas eve family tradition is savoring some delicious oyster stew for dinner. This year we also spent the afternoon cooking up the ingredients we'll need for our all homemade Christmas dinner. Sauteing the veggies for the stuffing, making the croutons from our homemade bread. Stirring the bubbly creamy filling for the green bean casserole and cooking down the fresh cranberry sauce. Rolling out the pie crusts and filling the pie. Little N put on her apron and helped by eating a good portion of the fresh berries and celery. Top it all off with making snow angels outside in the deep snow.

Baby Ro woke up with me this morning and spent a good amount of time just looking around. I guess it tuckered him out because he slept most of the day.

Six years ago we were supposed to be holding our newborn on Christmas morning. But it didn't work out that way. So glad to be holding my boy this Christmas.

Day 6, Solstice

2010-12-21T23:00:00.000-08:00

Baby Ro is such a strong kid. Here I was all worried about having a 39 weeker when my other kids were 41 weekers. Ro is already holding his head up well and even pushing up with is arms.

I discovered baby Ro is a thumbsucker!

Today he took his first sling ride. I got ambitious and decided to make homemade egg and kefir bread and sugar cookies for decorating. Of course Ro woke up half way through and I had to nurse him in the sling while kneading dough. How's that for day 6! He loved it.

I'm a cloth diaper addict. So far I've been very happy with our all natural fiber diaper stash. Changing diapers is actually fun when you get to use super cute diapers and wool covers. Pics to come.

I'm busy planning Christmas dinner which we're hosting for family. Thank goodness I feel so amazing. I hopped out of bed this morning and got half way down stairs before I realized that I was pain free.

The snow is melty and the kids made a gigantic snow man for the front yard. J pulled them around in their sleds with the lawn tractor. Slushy fun! Then homemade chili (one of my freezer meals) and my homemade kefir bread.

Happy Solstice! Unfortunately it was overcast here and we couldn't see the lunar eclipse last night.

5 days old

2010-12-20T21:48:00.000-08:00

I can't believe I had a baby just 5 days ago. Besides having larger boobs and being totally in love with the most beautiful baby alive I feel like my usual self.

I'm looking at the calender with dread knowing that in a blink of the eye he will be a week old, then two weeks, then a month old. His tiny newborness will fade away in a few months. His toothless grin will be replaced. I wish it didn't happen so fast.

Until now I've never come out of a birth thinking "I can't wait to do that again"! Usually it's "that was pure hell, I'm never doing it again"!

Today he spent quite a good amount of time in quiet awareness. Looking around all wide eyed. It's amazing watching him see his world for the first time.

He nursed twice last night and then slept for a good number of hours. He also decided he wasn't going to nurse side lying so I had to sit up half asleep. Hopefully he decides to let me nurse laying down tonight!

He's figured out this whole nursing thing now too and also that he absolutely does not like a dirty diaper. I've only attempted to cue him outside the diaper (EC) once but we'll be working on that. I love sparing a diaper and making baby happy by staying dry.

This is a terrible flash picture but it was special to catch him with his eyes open! I love his slate colored eyes! I can't wait to find out what color they'll end up being.

Baby R

2010-12-19T11:16:00.000-08:00

Baby R arrived safely Thursday at 8:05 am. 8 pounds 12 ounces, 20 inches long with a 15 inch head! He was two pounds bigger than I thought he would be. I can't believe such a big baby was in there!

R was born screaming with a heavy coating of vernix cheese. His APGAR at 5 mins was 10. He's just as perfect as can be. Looks exactly like his siblings but he has light hair and skin. The other's had black hair, olive skin. Looks like daddy's ginger genes might have come through this time.

The surgery was just super. I'm sore but moving around just fine with lots of energy. More details will come.

Tomorrow, Baby!

2010-12-15T18:50:00.000-08:00

My last words before I head to bed and then into surgery early in the morning.

I hope I'm still this calm come 7:30 when they wheel me into the operating room! Earlier I was happily packing up baby's wool longies to wear in the hospital (oh which longies to bring?!) over his little cloth diapers, t shirts, hat and booties. Packing up my red raspberry leaf tea, the matching nursing pillow and swaddling blanket I made. Packing up a skein of wool so I can knit a pea pod and hat for the newborn photos. Packing my Love and Logic book, which I'm only half way through, and my latest Mothering magazine. Packing a print out of ICAN's whitepaper Recovering from a Cesarean: Tips on Healing.

Saying a blessing and resting peacefully and relishing the wonderful life my partner and I have made together. I never thought, at 19, when I got married that we would be 30 and have built such an amazing life and family together. Life could not be more perfect. We are very lucky.

I have so many friends supporting me, I am so blessed.

Thank You Stretchmarks

2010-12-14T10:31:00.000-08:00

Thank you stretchmarks for leaving me alone! Happily I will go into surgery without the giant road map belly. It's not a big deal I just like to count my blessings.

I was complaining to my doctor about baby's lack of movements the past few days and was happy to have my first ever non stress test. Of course baby got very active for the test. He's been quiet again since then. I'll be relieved to have him out.

My nurse was very nice which helped me feel a lot more calm about the quality of the birth we're about to have. Yay for small town hospitals!

I predict he's going to be 6 pounds 11 ounces 19 inches long. And hopefully very healthy and nurses just as well as the others.

I spoke to the doctor about getting my prefered pain meds after the surgery and making sure there's no issue taking my placenta home. It will be dried and encapsulated for me to aid in healing.

Since we're having the baby in a different town we will get whatever pediatrician is on call. It worries me but my Newborn Care Sheet is pretty simple (no bath, no vax, no circ, no bottles) and hopefully they don't give J a hard time. I'm sure the Head of Nursery will remember us from 3 years ago! The homebirth transfer people who don't bathe their baby! lol

Time for resting and making sure I eat well, take my vitamin D and keep my brain focused on the happy experience we're about to have!

Baby Week! Baby Plus Blizzards

2010-12-12T14:46:00.000-08:00

Baby week is here! Our little one will be here some time this week.

We have had two and a half days of kid free time together. If you can count being hugely pregnant as "kid free". It's not exactly. No rollercoasters or staying out all night salsaing with margaritas. We're trying to make the most of it. We know full well that we have several months of exhaustion ahead of us.

Imagine my surprise when, just as we began an epic blizzard + many inches of rain turning to ice, I realized I had been contracting every three minutes for two hours and it was getting more intense. By 3 am, after 4 hours of contractions they intensified a second time and I was forced to go downstairs to deal with them more comfortably. I started to panic over the pain and not knowing what I wanted to do, stay home or head to the hospital in an icy blizzard in the middle of the night. I didn't feel very confident at all about having a baby on no sleep. I eventually told baby we needed to sleep now and found that as long as I was sitting up the contractions seemed to stop. So I slept there in the chair for a few hours.

I hope the blizzard dies down tonight just so, if labor starts again, I'm not freaked out about having to make a long dark and dangerous trip in.

We have yet to install the carseat or pack our bag.

Snowy

2010-12-01T11:52:00.000-08:00

Yesterday we had a smattering of flurries falling all day. The temperature outside today is 28. What a cold way to start December! C couldn't wait to get his snow pants on. A bit of snow blew and congregated on the deck. Next time maybe they'll remember to wear gloves.

So excited to go cut down our Christmas Tree this weekend.

Two More Weeks!

2010-11-30T15:40:00.000-08:00

I'm pretty useless at this point. I'm basically a blob rolling around grumbling and wincing as the baby tries to tear open my lower uterus with his fists/head/whatever, I'm not entirely sure.

I feel terrible not being able to do a whole lot with the kids. Times like this I wish I had a nanny.

There are numerous viruses going around. I can tell my body has already fought off a few things and is fighting something right now. I'm trying to take good care of myself so I don't get sick. Which means I really shouldn't have been running errands yesterday in the cold rain knowing I was feeling off. I wish I would have stocked the freezer already with those local organic chickens so I could have some great broth right now. And definately not gorged myself on bread pudding at lunch.

Only one more OB appointment, 1 field trip, 1 play date and 1 gymnastics class left. Other than that it's soaking up warmth from the fireplace, soup and red raspberry leaf tea.

Now if I could just stop nesting and if J could stop working over time and come home and nest for me things would be perfect.

Thanks to all who came to my Birth Blessing gathering. It was nice to have a few strong women around me giving off their good vibes. I know I'm cared about and that helps as I prepare for birth.

Fall Fun

2010-11-08T10:23:00.000-08:00

Our days haven't been terribly eventful (ie exausting). The kids enjoyed trick or treating our new little neighborhood, a small subdivision a few minutes from town. The yards are all enormous so instead of walking I gave into the temptation to follow the family in the van. At least I could be there to watch them.

Our 1.5 acres lent lots and lots of leaves for jumping in (pictured is less than half what we had). C got to run the leaf blower.

The kids are both in gymnastics for the first time and really liking it. N improves a lot each week. She couldn't walk the beam at all the first time but pretty soon she could hop and walk over cones. She's also working on her arm stregnth. She doesn't like to use her arms much.

They've recently both gotten into roller skating at home and so we finally took them to the roller rink. N did pretty good as she does pretty good on ice skates as well. C eventually fell and hit his bottom on one of his wheels. He's vowed to stick to ice skating from now on but I'm sure he'll regain some confidence soon. He's currently wanting to take ice skating lessons. We'll see if that changes by January.

Funny, I'm making post baby plans as if I'll only be out of the loop for 2 weeks.

Today it's time for roasting pumpkin seeds, making banana bread and cookies (for the freezer stash) and doing a trial cake in preparation for my Birth Blessing gathering.

Newborn Longies and hat from Turn a New Leaf Designs

Pregnancy. I'm starting to pack the hospital bag. Trying to decide which wool longies/hat combos to bring (pictured above). Both "first christmas" outfits have to come. And the outerwear, blankets, Moby wrap, boppy, swaddler, cloth diapers and wipes. I think baby will have more stuff than I do. But I'm so excited to use it! Now if only he would stop poking at my cervix making me think my water is going to pop.

33 week pregnancy jitters

2010-11-04T16:50:00.000-07:00

Over the last seven days things have gone down hill pretty remarkably. After my OB appointment last week I had a bad episode of painful contractions and the unfortunate part is that my OB is an hour away so I couldn't get right home and rest. I'm thankful that it went away and I haven't had anymore concerning contractions.

It wasn't long however before I starting feeling really irritable. I'm pretty demonic right now. I feel sorry for my poor family.

I've been dealing with the ocassional headache as well. I saw my naturopath who couldn't find anything wrong. No signs of pre ecclampsia either.

Baby is sitting really low. The chiro/naturopath insisted that I won't make it to my due date. Why he thinks that I don't know. It was just a curious remark and I really don't want to get my hopes up that this could all be over relatively soon.

The past few evenings I've felt emotionally freaked out. My hormones must be raging now! One evening I was wondering what in the hell I had done! I must have been totally nuts to get pregnant again! Why on earth did my husband let me do this? Tonight I got home and felt just generally like crap from head to toe and I've had a hard time not crying all evening over it.

I want to bend at the waist again. I want to stop accidentally knocking my kids over with the lead beach ball under my shirt. I feel guilty because I shouldn't be wishing this kid out at 33 weeks.

So, feeling huge and heavy, sick of having my bladder ground into my pubic bone, headaches, demonic bipolar attitude, no longer able to take long walks, do heavy shopping or clean constantly (even though I would love to), I'm not real pleasant. I'm starting to think I'd like this to be over now. I'll be here on the couch for the next four to six weeks if anyone needs me.

I'm just thankful that I had the foresight to buy myself a nice pair of wool slip on slippers because I wear these as regular shoes.

This was posted on my birth board
You know you're in the third trimester when, your daily schedule is:
pee
clean something that doesn't need to be cleaned
pee
sneak a piece of chocolate
pee
clean something else that doesn't need to be cleaned
pee
panic about how little time you have to finish cleaning things that don't need to be cleaned
*repeat*

5th Grade

2010-10-20T18:38:00.000-07:00

We are ahead of schedule, imagine that! We have already started 5th grade and I've finished outlining the remainder of our 5th grade requirements. We have till the end of 2011 to complete these and I'm sure we will have plenty of time even at our relaxed pace and having a baby.

I English/Language
1. Continue sign language weekly meetings
2. Scrabble
3. Sequential spelling lessons
4. Similes and metaphors
5. Use of colons, italics, quotation marks
6. Continued sustained silent reading
7. Book reports, verbal book evaluations and discussions
8. Reading Material
    a. Mark Twain, Adventures of Tom Sawyer
    b. Sherlock Holmes
    c. Secret Garden
    d. Alice in Wonderland

II Geography/History
1. Continue using latitude and longitude
2. Early world explorers
3. Westward expansion
    a. The gold rush
    b. Transcontinential railroad

III Art
1. Visit an art Museum
2. Asian art
3. Music
    a. Classical vs popular styles
    b. Early American songs
    c. Slavery songs, Appalachian songs

IV Math
1. Prime and composite numbers
2. Rounding numbers with decimals
3. Finding an average
4. Making a pie chart
5. Geometry
    a. Find the area of a triangle and parallelogram
    b. Find the volume of a 3 dimensional shap

V Science
1. Continue Spectrum science workbook
2. The periodic table
3. Atomic structure
4. Molecules
5. Chemical compounds
6. Life Science
    a. Class, family, order, genus, species
    b. Parts of a cell, plant and animal
    c. Asexual reproduction, plant reproduction
7. Visit the natural history museum

VI Health
1. Gymnastics class
2. Germs and the immune system
3. Baby brother education

62 days

2010-10-14T09:52:00.000-07:00

Just 62 days until we meet our baby! The birth day has been scheduled for December 16th. It's very exciting and I'm anxious for it to be here. I'm finishing up the last bits of baby preparation and Christmas shopping. I need to make another dozen cotton baby wipes but everything else is done and ready for a new baby.

I'm starting to think about the mama preparation now! I realized today that it will probably be impossible for me to get in and out of our super low bed for at least a week. I need to make sure I will be comfortable downstairs with baby. We will bring in a recliner for me and a cradle for baby. A few soups need to be thrown in the freezer so I can be well nourished. I need to find a couple pairs of super comfy pants and make sure I have plenty of vitamins and herbs to help me heal. Floradix for iron, some calendula and comfrey infusion for the wound. Some homeopathic remedies....what else?

I never thought I'd be looking forward to a planned cesarean. I spent the last three births fighting with every bit of me to have a normal natural birth, at home, in comfort and support. While we were trying to conceive this baby I spent the whole 16 months worried that I wouldn't know what to do about the birth. As soon as I found out I was pregnant I felt very strongly that this is what I needed to do. And so I've followed my heart. I've felt nothing but calm and confident about it and I feel total acceptance of a situation that, while of course I would love for it to be an idyllic powerful natural birth, it will not be for many reasons. It will still be an amazing empowering union.

Pregnancy Tickers from WiddlyTinks.com

Chocolate Coconut Oatmeal Cookies

2010-10-10T10:38:00.000-07:00

We love cookies. I try to use freshly ground grains, plenty of grass fed butter and free ranged eggs and little sugar. A variation of my cinnamon walnut cookies since I didn't have all the ingrediants. It's getting really hard to find cinnamon chips at the grocery stores. Sorry these didn't last long enough to take a picture!

Ingrediants:
1 stick grass fed butter
1 tsp vanilla
1/2 cup fresh ground oat flour
1 c whole white wheat flour
1/2 c sucanat or brown sugar
1 egg
1/2 t baking soda
1 hershey bar, grated
1 c shredded coconut

In a small pan on low melt butter, sugar and chocolate together.
In a bowl mix all remaining ingrediants then add butter mixture.
Bake at 350 for about 12 minutes.

Anemia and Baby Position

2010-10-09T08:41:00.000-07:00

I slept 12 straight hours last night. Maybe the tiredness of the first and third trimester are inescapeable. I will keep on trying to find a way out of it though! I don't tend to indulge in triple shot mochas in the afternoon anymore. I always battle with anemia and am pretty glad to say that it hasn't been too bad this time around. The Naturopath says everything is in good working order I just need a little extra iron. I'm also pretty happy to report only 22 pounds gained. No pounds gained for a month or two now. That's not for not eating, because I have been quite hungry lately. Who knows. Trying to stay on top of what my body needs is a lot like standing on a board that's on top of a big ball.

I never could windsurf.

I don't look all that much larger now than I did at 20 and 23 weeks. Even my pants aren't as tight as they were a month ago. This is probably because baby is in a much lower position.

After realizing baby was oblique, with his head plastered to my left hip bone (above) , I got down on the floor and inverted so he could float back up and reposition. This worked very well. Inverting is really helpful for allowing baby to reposition and also for taking baby's weight off the sciatic nerve if you have sciatica. He floated up and squirmed like crazy. Maybe he felt like he was falling? I squatted and did some pelvis rounds on my birth ball to get his head seated in the right place. Now I have a big head resting on my bladder where it should be (or maybe I should have just been thankful for not having to pee every 30 minutes)? For more information on Optimal Fetal Positioning see Spinning Babies.

Little N saw the Naturopath yesterday and we figured out she has something going on with her bladder. I wasn't sure if her incontinence was a behavioral thing, a nervous system thing or perhaps some irritation or infection. I got some homeopathic bladder drops for her and hopefully she'll be a lot better in a few days.

Fall, round two

2010-10-04T11:58:00.000-07:00

The second wave of chill has hit us. Colors are slowly creeping into the trees. Busy busy fall. Normally, I would be hard at work canning. This year I'm using the freezer to stock up. I will need to prepare some easy frozen meals for myself pre and post birth. Considering Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner might not fit on my plate this year I'll have to have recipes, instructions and frozen things ready for J to prepare. My freezer is filling up with stocks, soups, cooked meat and fruits and veggies.

Fall means festivals and stews and bread (oh bread). The weekends are filled with things to do. The straw bales and pumpkins are already placed in the yard. The Halloween Party plans are in progress. Kettle corn and hot chocolate are being made and consumed in front of the fireplace.

The camper has been gutted for it's late year remodel. The flooring and furniture are gone. We hope to have it fixed up and ready for a trip out east in a few weeks. I hope to catch some amazing fall color in Vermont because I hear that's what people do in the fall.

{face w/ hands under chin}

We took a peak, probably our last until December, at baby last week. He is already three pounds, has chubby cheeks and was moving around in the cutest newborn fashion. I'm getting uncomfortable. I need to do some yoga and will probably feel better.

I finished my placenta encapsulation kit complete with empty capsules and directions for my MIL to dehydrate, grind and encapsulate my placenta in the day following the birth.

C started the sequential spelling program this week.
Studied first aid
Toured an art gallery
Split rails
Dug potatoes
Used a wood burning pen
Explored tooth structure and tooth decay
Read chapter books
Watched Division Rap (the video) which C said was "like for 5 year olds".

N started gymnastics class! She is about six inches shorter than everyone else in the class. She seemed so big to me until she stood next to all those other 3-4 year olds!

C starts gymnastics in a few weeks. Should be a great cold weather outlet for them.

Festival

2010-09-21T10:20:00.000-07:00

Every year our family volunteers with the local 1800's festival. Every year we get more involved and the festival gets bigger and better. I love that my kids love this. I am all about going back to simpler times. Times when people knew where their food came from, spent time talking instead of commuting or watching the news. Kids had responsibilities, a few simple toys and tons of time outdoors.

Highlights of the weekend!
C got to hold the ribbon at the opening ceremony.
Little N's close up was in the Monday newspaper. I'm told she is adorable.
J and I were filmed by an unknown news crew..... weird.
C competed in the junior tomahawk throwing contest and won the corn shelling contest.

Bringing green to the festival!
As a family we provided recycling bins next to each dumpster.
We provided information about traditional children's games, composting, enamelware and home canning at those various exibits.
I spent the weekend selling upcycled adult and children's aprons, baby bibs, Abe Lincoln top hats and locally bottled spring water.

C often takes a bucket of items around the grounds to sell. He sold an entire box of handmade chocolates in just an hour! He also sells our locally bottled water. He is quite a sales man and few people can resist.

J spent hours on stilts posing as Uncle Sam giving buttons and flags to children and raising the barn as well as many other chores.

Many activities were offered this weekend! Children could play with wooden toys, tops, jacks, make candles, view period clothing, play traditional games, watch apple butter making, dutch oven stew and bread and deep frying over the fire with rendered lard. Contests of all types. Many interesting people showing off their hobbies such as windmill making, carving, weaving. And of course the volunteer Calvary encampment teaching us all about the civil war.

School Days Preparing for Fall

2010-09-15T15:11:00.000-07:00

Here's our end of summer homeschool activities update!   These are things we've studied in the last 2-3 months. Amazing how we can cover so many topics without having a strict "school time".

C is working on 4th-5th grade at the moment (he is 8.5).   I prefer to spend 3-4 days on field trips and only a few days requiring some sort of school work. Many things he does for his own enjoyment such as math computer games, online research, reading and drawing.

I'm so happy that C has finally gotten into reading and writing more! This week he wrote his first book report and found a heap of chapter books which he's spent several hours a day reading.

Math
Multiplication review
Geometry review, angles, quadrilaterals, calculating perimeter and area
Long division
Roman Numeral review
Converting fractions to decimals
Adding and subtracting positive and negative numbers together
Exponentials
Comparing fractions with < = >
Two step equations
Comparing units of measurement, length, weight, volume

History
The Star Bangled Banner
The War of 1812
Presidents of the United States
    Assasination, illness, impeachment
The National Anthem
Declaration of Independence
The Pledge of Allegiance

Geography
Finding coordinates with latitude and longitude
Time zones
Hemispheres
Common geographical vocabulary; peninsulas, gulf, plateau, island etc

English
Fourth grade vocabulary
Many library books, chapter books
Dinosaurs, book report
Spelling lessons, 4th grade spelling

Field Trips
Radio station tour

Attending painting group
Astronomy group
Camping trip
Organic farming field trip
Dairy cheese making field trip
Scouts
Kitchen Chemistry class @ Discovery Museum
1800's working craft fair

Art
The color wheel
Famous painting and painters

Science
Temperature; scales, freezing, boiling etc
4th Grade spectrum science workbook, Buoyancy, Molecules, Fire, Electrical circuits

Still left to do! Three months before baby!
Zoo classes
Discovery museum classes

First Aid
Famous classical composers
American Indian art, Colonial art, Renaissance art
Aztec, Incas, Mayas
Da Vinci
Magellan
The Field Museum of Natural History
Book reports
Finish Spectrum 4th grade science, 4th grade spelling, 4th grade vocabulary

December/January we will take a baby break but start working on online math; pre algebra. 5th grade vocabulary, spelling and book reports. I'll get around to writing out our goals for 5th grade in January.

Milk Kefir

2010-09-09T20:44:00.000-07:00

and other recipies from this week.

Yesterday I prepared kefir cheese stuffed manicotti with spinach. So delicious. I made my kefir cheese (kefir leban) as usual and used it instead of ricotta cheese adding lots of finely chopped spinach to the cheese and to the sauce. The kids raved it was their most favorite meal ever.

I've been really happy with the new kefir grains I bought this month. Their taste is not as tart or yeasty as my old grains. I was pretty happy to make something that completely passed as regular sour cream to the kids. Today I had the first milk kefir smoothie I've had in a long time (milk kefir w/ hemp protein, chocolate whey protein, banana and peanut butter).

I wish I could say I was having the same great luck with my other cultures but alas raising a family and several different cultures is time consuming. My poor kombucha scobies that have been soaking in vinegar for a week now waiting for food....

Apples and more apples this week as I process our apple trees. The children eat several apples a day. Today it was caramel peanut apples and muffin tin apple pies. Tomorrow, raw apple cider and soon after I will have some fizzy hard cider.

I'm afraid the third trimester is upon me and suddenly I've felt tired. I need more raw food. Some raw orange juice would be just the ticket but I'm a slave to the citrus barren north.

Blue Mod Flowers

2010-09-08T05:27:00.000-07:00

I've been a regular at Hobby Lobby this month. I was pretty delighted to see some awesome cotton prints on sale a while back. Obviously I loved this blue number. A few projects from this week. #1 a super cute fleece lined baby bunting/swaddle blanket. I look forward to using this so much. #2 nursing pillow. #3 left over fabric becomes the soft fluffy applique lovey pillows I'm making for the kids for Christmas. They'll love having one to match.

Sweater Day

2010-09-04T17:58:00.000-07:00

We happened to find the children new sweaters at Goodwill yesterday. It was a good thing too because we woke up to an envigorating chill just shy of 50 degrees this morning. The children were nestled in their beds with three blankets each. They came crawling downstairs with sweaters and blankets and smiles.

The boys used their ladders to pick what was left at the top of our two apple trees while I started chopping and boiling down apple pie filling to freeze. I was obligated to bake a fresh apple pie in the process.

Lunch was chicken noodle soup with the ever delicious and nourishing bone broth from local chicken, lots of onions and garlic to fight off the bugs, nutrient dense kale and homemade whole grain egg yolk noodles. In addition, great chicken noodle soup must have lots of grass fed butter in it.

Yesterday I turned 31. I got every pregnant mother's dream birthday gift; beer bottles! Heh. I look forward to filling these with bubbly water kefir and kombucha. Super excited to finally have a whole case of these!

For my birthday I also got great news from a naturopath who had a look over and performed muscle testing to see what organs weren't working quite right or perhaps find out that I was deficient in some nutrient. Well, conclusion was that I am totally healthy which is quite surprising considering I'm pregnant and have been pregnant and/or nursing for almost a decade now. Wish I could complain about a case of sciatica or perhaps a dangerously low blood calcium level from being sucked dry for 10 years but alas I can't say enough about traditional foods, raw food and fermented foods!